I'm On A Diet Mode

Yeah Men.

It's September once again, which means new set of Cosmo Bachelors, and still, wala pa rin ako doon.

DREAM KO TO.

Mapasali sa cosmomen. Holy sh*t. Sana naman magkatotoo na itong dream ko.

Actually, may theme na ako. Since I am the hottest banker, kailangan nasa bank ang venue ng shot ko. Nakasandal ako sa vault, with all the money covering my you-know-what. In short, pera lang ang suot ko. Isn't that hot? Yeah men. And the subtitle would bear nothing else but "the hottest banker in town".

Kaya from this day on, meaning dinner on Sept 3, babawasan ko na rice ko for 12 days. Bawas meaning half na lang. Minus all the carbs (as much as i can, sa rice ako strict), sweets, and oily foods. So that means till till Sept 15 yun.

By Sept 16 breakfast to Sept 17 dinner, back to normal na ang carbs at rice pero hindi lamon.

By Sept 18 breakfast till 30. no carbs at all.

October 1, back to normal. Oct 2, no carbs at all.

Hanggang masanay ako na less carbs na lang.

Na-inspire ako ni Sir Richard, isang RM sa RCBC. Macho nya dati. Eto daw yung diet nya dati. May term syang ginamit kaso nakalimutan ko na. Dati yun kasi ang taba taba na nya ngayon, sana di nya mabasa, pero dahil tumanda na sya, ayun lumobo na. Ayoko naman maging ganun!

Tapos by January, gym na ako. Slimmer's or Fitness depende kung mayaman ako.

Sabi kasi ni Raish, dapat both, exercise and diet, para maging sexy. Bubuhat ako ng weights para maging macho.

Try ko na rin mag stop mag yosi by hmm November? Tapos yung inom, mga once a week na lang dapat.

Okay gagawa na ako ng check list:

Sept 3 - Sept 15 Lessen Rice and other carbs
Sept 16 - Sept 17 Back to normal
Sept 18 - Sept 30 No carbs at all
Oct 1 Back to normal
Oct 2 No carbs


Huhuhu. May dare pa naman sa akin si Anabee Alingog last year, dapat daw mag gym na ako tapos inonominate nya ako sa Cosmomen 2009.

EH ANONG NANGYARI?

NAKAKALUNGKOOOOOOT!


Kaya etong post na ito ang magiging inspiration ko. ;)

I feel...

Bored.

First time ever to feel bored while in front of the computer and whole world wide web. I seem not to have anything to do, but of course in reality, i have so much in store to do. I just dont like doing them. Just like a 6-year old brat, i am now throwing my tantrums.

Fat.

I can now feel the lines around my waist and tummy. These lines that never really came into place for the longest time. Or should i say, since 3rd year college. Indeed, each day is my fattest day.

Happy.

Yeah men. Even the most emo post can tell you the writer's happy. Happy because... i can now laugh truly, madly, deeply. Happy that i can now feel that adjustments are now coming into place.

Bobo.

Because i can not think the way i am thinking before. I now can not pretend to be profound.

Sleep deprived.
Alcohol running trhough my veins.

These perhaps are the reasons why.

Am sad. I need ... (thinking for the right word for ahh 5mins) meditation (yeah that's the word) in a far flung place.

On Client Calls

For the sake of satisfying my longing for a new post, I'll update you with what I did for the last, erm, whatever hours or days ago.

This thing work backwards so..

• I arrived home a little later than usual (not because of gimik but because of work). I came from a client call which happened to be in Batangas, Laguna, and Alabang. Nakakapagod!
• Ngayon, sinusubukan kong gawin (no, i SHOULD be doing) my client call report. Pero tinatamad ako.
• Since last week, nasa OJT ako sa RCBC Plaza, last week nasa Credit Dept ako, this time nasa Corporate Banking naman.

Ang boring. Hahaha. Going back to my original self...

Wow. Namiss ko magblog. Namiss ko naman magkwento. Oh well, ayoko maging unfair sa blog ko kaya ngayong masaya ako, magrereport na ulit ako sa kanya.

Ang sarap ng feeling nung client call kanina. Haha. Feeling sosyal ako sa company car, with the driver, with the long sleeves and tie effect, meeting executives of ecozone clients of RCBC... those things.

Nakakapagod lang talaga. Pero imagine, nasa 2 provinces ako kanina. Maghapon lang yun ah. What an experience. Cool.

Pero eto na, little by little, kinakabahan na ulit ako.

By December, 2nd phase na ng MT program namin. By that time, dapat naipasa ko na ang first phase at sana ako ang nasa first place. Rhyme! Haha. Sana maabot ko naman ang pangarap kong yun! LOL. Oh, i am the highest sa written part as of the moment, kaso 4th lang ako sa revalida. Haay. I hope mahabol ko sila. Through God's will. And miracle.

By June next year naman, madedeploy na kami sa department kung saan kami fit, either by choice, by skill, or by availability. Sana sa skill and choice yung mapatapat sa akin. Gusto ko sa marketing! Dun lang naman ako interesado eh. Although medyo natutuwa ako sa Credit kaso boring dun eh. Hindi naman ako magiging masaya.

Grabe. Parang nakakatamad na mag trabaho sa bangko. Parang wala akong choice na gustong gusto ko talaga. Parang boring lahat. I have yet to find out. Pati mga dark secrets sa bank - yung politics, kanino dapat ako kumampi, ano dapat ang attitude ko... those things, sana maka cope agad ako.

At sana ma promote naman agad ako. Haay. Ace, galingan mo. Sana every year may promotion ka. Or at least 1 year ka lang maging JAM, tapos AM na. 2 years sa AM, tapos 1 year na SAM, tapos 2 years na Manager, then AVP na! Then lipat ka na sa iba. Haha.

Ang pangit na ng mga post ko. Parang batang, immature, na mababaw mag isip. Oh well, hindi gumagana ang isip ko. Utak ko lang ang gumagana. Magkaibang bagay yun.

HANGOVER

This isn't about me, this is about the movie Hangover.

Has anyone of you watched it? Darn it was so cool. That was the coolest non-sense, time-wasting movie I have ever seen.

Watch it. Really cool.

Haha. That reminds me that i have never experienced the worst hangover ever.

i love you Q

Q,

I know i have done all the worst things one could ever think of. I never understood you, seems like i never cared for you, you may think that i am too selfish to even bother about you. I know its too late. It is too late. But i wish it isn't.

I love you.

I must admit, i'm still unsure right now.

But, so selfish of me, i must say, i can't live without you. I know it's not a proper justification. But i can't live without you. I can't stand losing you. Please don't leave me.

I've always made you feel you were responsible for all that's happening between us. Especially on matters concerning me. For that, i am really sorry.

I can understand if you can't forgive me. And soon forget about me.

But please.

I don't know what else to say.

I need you. I want to be always with you. I can't live without you. I love you.

I'm immature. I've been constantly trying to improve. Please bear with me. I will understand if you won't. But, i just can't afford to lose you.

I will never ever forget you. You will always be in my heart. You are my one and only Q.

Quiero vivir contigo.

Month-long Blogsarry Ko Na Pala

You will look like this when you're feeling hot.













And this when you're feeling cold.

On August 17, 2009, I will be celebrating my first blogsarry. 1 year of emoness, happiness, panlalait at paninira sa ibang tao, at pagiging feeling matalino. As a treat to myself, haha, I'd like to show you a video of my first acoustic concert, tutal first lang din naman ang pinaguusapan.





SOMEDAY WE'LL KNOW
Lasing Version

Please Dont Worry About Me I'm Fine

I wanted to write something but my mind is so lost that even I can not express what I am feeling. I can not put into words the emotions that are overpowering me.

Ilang araw at gabi na rin akong mabigat ang loob. Ang bigat. Ayoko na nga isipin kung ano man gumugulo sa isip ko kasi hindi ko naman maayos, disorganized talaga eh. Gusto ko umisip ng solusyon pero i feel so numb and stupid and drained to even think about it.

Napansin ko, puro emo yung mga nalalagay ko dito. Ayoko na nga sana maging emo eh. Pero pag masaya kasi ako, i rarely find time to even share them to you. Para kasing ang bilis nangyayari. UNFAIR! Kapag masayang emotions sandali lang sa isip ko, pero kapag malungkot, kagaya nito, sobrang tagal.

Alam ko na! Negative akong tao.

Or perhaps, naging negative akong tao.

I lost the optimism that i once had. I lost the hopefulness, cheerfulness, and the strong person that i was once with.

Masyado akong nag-iisip. Kung ano ano lang. Simpleng bagay pinapalala ko.

I wanted to get out of this. But how?

I don't have a problem. Actually, i do. But it's a problem that only i can understand and therefore only I can solve.

On other thoughts, I must admit, I am enjoying my stint in RCBC now. I am beginning to treasure my new found friends. Lagi kami umiinom. Lagi kaming tumatawa. Everyday kami magkasama. Yun nga lang, hindi pa rin ako nakakamove on. Hinahanap ko pa rin kasi yung mga high school at college friends ko. Every time may event or lalabas sila na wala ako, sobrang nalulungkot ko. I feel so different, so out of place, so out of our previous world.

I miss my happy self.

But i dont even know what or who brought me into this state of mind. I don't wanna blame anyone. Siguro nga isa sila sa mga dahilan kung bakit negative ako ngayon pero still, dapat ako ang may last say. Dapat hindi ako bumigay o sumuko o nagbago dahil sa kanila.

They are all part of the challenge which I feel i am currently losing.

Sana makabawi pa ako.

Ang haba ng post. Again, please don't worry about me im fine.